BEEKEEPER

There is a competition for my affection and it is stretching me thin. What with Nicole not leaving until tomorrow for L.A., this Eucalyptus thing is taking it's toll. I have a mind to call up Mr. Crowe myself and express my great disappointment at his setting this chain of events into motion. I could probably even snag his number off the internet now that Paris Hilton's cellphone has been hacked. Doesn't Russell know that the plight of our relationship (me and Nicole) rests in a healthy balance of time present AND time away? This film cancellation has put a major crimp in my style.
First, it was my writing that was abruptly disturbed last Friday when she showed up at my door. Granted, the weekend was okay between the two of us. I just hadn't anticipated having to entertain my heart's endearing passion for all of it. Concentrated, patient love like that takes a lot of time, and all I could think about was my projects falling behind. Call me a jerk, but none of this precludes the fact that I do love Nicole with all my heart. She just got in the way this time. Am I bad?

Now, the current problem. At least until she leaves tomorrow. The new Tori Amos album came out yesterday, and that has received all my focus. My writing is left behind. Every time Tori addresses the world, my world stops. I have to fill my ears with her luscious voice. You see, about 5 years ago, we met in a Borders Books. She was a real encouragment to me at that time. I was going through some hard situations in my life and my writing, I felt, really sucked. She read a play that I had written a first draft of and she actually liked it. Said that I needed to trust my muse and follow through. She didn't know, at the time, that she was my muse. But, we started to see each other a little and I fell in love with the person behind all those great thoughts. It didn't last long. She started to hang with sprites and fairies and the long walks in her garden became too esoteric for my own tastes, so we fell out of touch. Then she got married and had a kid and moved to England. All the things that stop love affairs. I still love her music though. And I am constantly looking for bits of myself in her songs. Anything to know that she still thinks about me.

So, locking myself in the house yesterday to spend time with another woman, if only in my ears, was too much for Nicole. She became irritable and frustrated. This, of course, made me irritable and frustrated. Maybe there is a place and time where two women are willing too share your affection in harmony, but the present is not it. I'm still listening to Tori right now, but she is singing about Mary Magdelene instead of her time with me. So, I'll keep buying her albums. In the meantime, I have a lot of catching up to do with Nicole before she leaves. Wouldn't want her to go out of town for this press junket and end up with Will Ferrell or anything. Then there are the Academy Awards on Sunday night, which I will be watching at home. Come to think of it, she has no right complaining about my time with Tori. I'll be watching Sunday, baby. Try to keep your hands off all those leading men. Remember, who you come home to.